UPDATE: Hey, check out the new Protect Your Kids page and the supporting blog post. I also want to say thanks to the legal team that helped me out so very much,and continues to do so daily.

Yes, I’m that guy. How long does it take to become famous (or infamous, depending on your point of view)? Well I still don’t think I’m famous, but it took me exactly 8 minutes and 23 seconds to become memorialized, whether I wanted to or not. If you’ve not seen the video, check it out below. If you have, save us both the embarrassment, and read on.

 

Why Build This Site?

That’s a funny question that deserves a serious answer. There are a lot of reasons, but I’ll go ahead and knock out the most obvious ones right up front.

1) Since that video was created, my daughter and I have become known across the world, and it’s easier for us to have one place to communicate where we control the content, as opposed to keeping everything on Facebook’s servers. We simply cannot keep on top of the thousands of different posts on various Facebook walls. Therefore we have the new blog.

2) Purely by some unimaginable accident the video went viral. My daughter broadcast her four-letter-filled rant to a couple hundred friends. I attempted to broadcast the result to the same group of people. A couple hundred people saw her original post. So far, 27 million people have seen my response. The punishment, quite by accident, far outweighed the crime. I still stand by my decision; my daughter still deserved to be punished, but for me to go on national television and compound that is something I can’t do as a father. I’ve been contacted by every major news network in the country, and while I appreciate the support some people have shown me, there is no conscionable way I can go on television and profit from my daughter’s embarrassment. Because the very first news media coverage had such impossibly incorrect “spin” on my intentions, I instead began communicating with them solely through Facebook. Now, after hundreds of thousands of comments on Facebook, millions of views on Youtube and tens-of-thousands of calls on every company and private phone number I have, I’ve decided to put it all in one place and respond to the comments, questions, criticisms and accusations here on our own website. I would rather my family earn what little bit of ad revenue this site might make than to make Mark Zuckerburg richer. I don’t think he needs any more money. I’ve been offered TV shows, interviews and had the opportunity to earn more money this week alone than in any entire year of my life. But for the same reasons mentioned above I have declined. As tempting as it is, I can’t do it under this premise.

3) This needs to get off my Facebook wall. I’m sure those of you who are interested in the story and it’s far-reaching implications on parenting, social media, and other platforms aren’t the slightest bit interested in what I planted in my garden today.

4) Hundreds of thousands of people across the world have commented and shared their thoughts, feelings, and sometimes their anger at the issue. We need a place where we (my family) can respond to those comments. This is that place.

6) Facebook doesn’t allow us to post everything we’d like to. We cant control the fonts, embed pictures, reference the videos, or anything else that makes for clear concise delivery of information. Here, on our own server we can do all that and more, and we can keep the topics focused. The topics I accidentally brought to light with my video are many, and parents across the nation have been encouraging us to respond to them. So we’re going to do that here.

7) And finally… It’s my hope that one day soon, others that find themselves in a heated situation could use this blog as THEIR voice, and who knows, maybe they too will get their 8 minutes of fame.

The impact of this video on my family has opened discussions across the globe. For the foreseeable future, I will be making daily updates (as often as I can) as to how it’s affecting my daughter and my family. We will also be using the blog feature of this site to respond to any and all media requests within reason.

If you’d like to stay updated on what’s going on, enter your email address up at the top-right of this page and click “subscribe.”

Have a good day y’all…


Fan Pages

Ok, so wow, I have fan pages on Facebook. Talk about things I never thought would happen in a million years and THAT is one of them.

I’m writing this to explain my actions on Facebook recently where I asked a bunch of supporters to  help me take down some of these fan pages. Some people don’t understand why, and I’m sure the fans themselves probably don’t understand why, so I thought it needed clarification.

Without making this a fifteen page blog post, here are the main reasons:

1) Not everyone out there is smart enough to know these aren’t really me. Yes, I’ve actually had people “friend” me there and then ask me in real-life why I never responded to them about something, only to find out it wasn’t me they were talking to anyway.

2) I don’t have time to constantly troll myself, jumping from page to page, to figure out what ones are good and what ones are bad. That would require me going back to each one every few days/weeks to be sure nothing inappropriate has been written. (See Example later)

3) Most of them are pretnding to actually BE me. There’s a fine line between a “Fan page” and “Identity theft”.

4) The safety of my family.

The best reason: My family’s Safety

Reasons one through three, when combined together, lead to reason number four. I’ll give you a couple real-world examples to show you what I mean from my standpoint.

Both of the above examples are from a “fan” page. This is the kind of stuff I don’t have the time to deal with. Ninety percent of the fan pages out there probably don’t do this kind of stuff, but the more of them that exist, the easier it is for ones like this to get lost in the mix.

Having people saying things like this and having other people thinking it’s me saying it, puts me in a fairly dangerous predicament.

I’m not super-famous, but I’m widely-known enough that it seems people will forever recognize my face when I go places. That’s really cool most of the time. Most of the people are nice and shake my hand or my daughter’s hand. Those people we really enjoy meeting. But let’s take that previous scenario and think about what it opens us up to.

All it takes is for one person to “think” that’s me and then see me later in a grocery store or out on the street somewhere. Some guy remembers seeing that post proclaiming that I punched a man, and then cursed about his kid. The next thing you know this guy is going out of his way to pick a fight with me in public, best case. Worst case he waits until I’m not looking and cracks me over the  head with something. What if my kids are with me? What if my eight year old son is around? These are the things YOU guys don’t have to worry about, but I do.

Another Real Life Scenario (contains language I’d normally never use)

An individual opened up a chat room on a fairly popular chat server, and said they were doing a live interview, pretending to be me. “Tommy Jordan gives parenting advice” or something along those lines was the topic of discussion. This actually happened a lot but one of these had me looking out my windows all night with a pistol in my hand and my wife sleeping on the couch with a gun.

People start coming into the chat room to hang out, talk with “me” and get my take on their parenting issues. During a chat session it comes out in the conversation that the parent talking to “me” is a black lady. The next thing you know this guy is saying “Oh, that’s the problem right there. You can’t make them nigger kids behave. You gotta just beat the hell out of ‘em.”

Thinks about what that person just said for a moment. First, it’s incredibly mean and an incredibly hate-filled remark. They could have chosen to pick on ANY particular group of people, and in my opinion that’s what they were planning to do. (Thankfully a moderator shut it down and got in touch with me about it quickly.) They probably planned on insulting black people, mexicans, illegal immigrants, the unemployed, homosexuals, democrats, short people, and every other dynamic of people they could, just to incite rage.

But what’s not at all cool to me is what could happen as a result of ONE statement like that. We live in a world where violence is easy to incite and the flames of rage are very easy to fan. It takes only a spark. A few of those statements against any particular group of people could quite literally have people stalking my family and throwing molotov cocktails through the windows of my house.

I could be seen in public six months later by someone who was in that chat room and the next thing you know I’m in a fight with someone I’ve never met, trying to stop them from killing me without killing them at the same time. I could be arrested for assault, or God forbid something worse. Someone could think my kids are being brought up that way. They’d see my child one day and beat them half to death while they are riding their bikes somewhere and I’d never know. This is what flashes through the mind of a parent when things like this happen. I’m not safe. My wife isn’t safe. My kids aren’t safe. I have to end this.

In short, I called my attorneys to figure out  the easiest and quickest way to prevent this. In short, the less pages about me that exist that aren’t directly controlled by me, the easier it is to know when something like this happens.

I love the fact that people consider themselves fans. It’s a feeling everyone should experience, though I’d certainly choose to have a better reason for fan-hood if I had the choice. But more important that having fans, is having my family safe and my reputation protected, both for personal and work-related reasons. I just absolutely can’t afford the risk of people saying something they think I’d endorse, pretending to be me, or pretending to speak on my behalf. It’s not safe and it’s not doing me any favors. So, I’m sorry to anyone who’s feelings get hurt, but I can’t let it continue.

Staying in Touch With People

If you are a “fan” then I’m honored beyond words, though I don’t think I’ve done anything to deserve your accolades, really. I’m just a normal dude who got his face plastered all over television one day. And sometimes it comes with more negatives than it does positives, ya know?

Anyway, if you’d like to stay in touch with me, you can do it a number of ways. I’m incredibly easy to find on Facebook, Twitter, or here on the 8minutesoffame.com web site. Those are about the best ways to reach me. You can email me if you’d like, though responding to emails sometimes is harder than on Facebook or Twitter. My email is [email protected]

Reporting Pages, Web Sites, or Other Identity Infringements

If you know of a web site that needs to be taken down, or a Facebook page that needs to come down, the easiest way to let me know is to send an email to [email protected]. I’ll get it pretty quick and get started on addressing the problem.

If it’s a Facebook page you can always use the “Report” feature on the page as well.

A final word on Identity Theft and Copyright

Thanks to the DMCA years ago, copyright protection is already pretty easy to handle. Identity theft isn’t as clear to people. To be guilty of identity theft someone doesn’t have to assume your identity and then commit a crime. Just attempting to pretend to be someone else falls well within the legal definition of identity theft, and it’s a crime at the federal level. It’s also a felony within each state, so it can be prosecuted either way, or sometimes both.

In North Carolina (where I live) it’s a class G felony, but becomes a class F felony if the victim were to get arrested or detained as a result of it. It’s also subject to restitution per Article 81C of Chapter 15A of our General Statutes. Whether or not the perpetrator lives in NC doesn’t matter. I do, so it falls under our jurisdiction to prosecute on a state level, even after a federal case is enacted.

One thing George Bush DID do right was sign into effect the Identity Theft Penalty Act, which makes the penalties on a federal level much nastier, often resulting in $100,000 fines and a minimum ten years in federal prison.

As far as copyright is concerned, on ALL of my websites, as well as my Facebook page, my copyright claim is laid out pretty clearly. In short copyright protection extends to include

  • Any media I’ve ever uploaded, per the DMCA, which means anything I write, any picture I post, or any video I upload, and any portions thereof.

That’s not just applicable to me. It’s the same protection afforded everyone in this digital age. Most people just aren’t aware of it. The mere act of publishing this blog post, under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, means it’s copyrighted the moment it hits the web.

So yes, in case this doesn’t spell it out clearly, using a person’s face, stealing their photos, or even quoting their written passages en-masse, are copyright violations. Anything someone puts on the web can be LINKED to without infringement because you’re taking the viewer/reader back to the source, but actually copying the material without express written permission is a crime.

Specifically, there IS  a federal copyright filed, so every still image taken from the video(s) falls under the legal definition of misappropriating the likeness because it’s a derivative work.

Do I dislike all the fan pages?

Of course not. That’s crazy. However, again, this comes down to advice from my legal team. It’s all about the “what-if” scenarios and protecting myself against the worst-case scenarios. If I were to agree to let sites A, B, and C use my images, posts, videos, or whatever and then try to file suit against the guy who posted those pictures above, the defense could argue that I’ve given express permission by failure to oppose, and therefore I can’t choose who I do and don’t try to take down.

Their argument is simply “If it’s ok for them, then it’s ok for us too, judge.” You and I would probably think that’s a stupid argument, but it’s one that would work. So in order to take down the ones that REALLY DO mean my family harm, I have to unilaterally attempt to shut down the others as well.

 To those who say “Give up”

I’ve had criticism from some on Facebook and other places who encourage me to  ”Just give up. You can’t possibly win this.” Well guys, I don’t agree. We, as a people, have decided to give up on a lot of stuff in the last few years. Our kids, our rights, our legal protections, etc. I generally don’t make it a habit of letting that kind of thing go, and neither should you. One of my beliefs is that if you don’t exercise a right or a freedom often, then you don’t notice when they take it away from you.

I wear a sidearm most everywhere I go, because it’s my right to do so. I tell people who ask my religious beliefs, because thankfully in this country, it’s still my right to do so. And now I’m trying to protect my copyright and my reputation for the sake of my families safety because… it’s my right to do so. Some won’t like it and some will claim I’m doing it for monetary gain or some other nonsense. These are the same people who think I’m rich or think it was all a hoax, so I’m not concerned with them anyway, really. Most months I barely get the bills paid and NO ONE would put themselves through all this for a hoax. Trust me. I’ve been there.

So, at the end of the day, I have to say Thanks to all of you who really do support me and my family through all this. I just have to also ask that you show your support through the proper means. Stealing my pictures, videos, and even mass-copying my blog posts isn’t the way to do it. If you’d like to link to anything I’ve uploaded, please feel free to do it. And share it with me. I love to read the blogs and posts from other people. Just don’t misappropriate the content illegally. Ok?

Those who stand for nothing, fall for anything. – Alexander Hamilton. 1978


Friday 10 PM – ABC’s 20/20. Don’t Miss It

It seems I’m destined to be in the news again, though this time hopefully the story will be more complete and less full of controversy and I’ll be in like-minded company… maybe. A few weeks ago a film crew and producers from ABC’s  20/20 came to visit; spending two and a half days to film some b-roll of my family, inundate us with interview questions, and see and what our normal lives are like, how we interact as a family, and what our views are on parenting, traumatic YouTube events aside.

The video that started it all

This Friday at 10 PM on ABC, the episode will air on television. I just got my glimpse of the footage myself, so like you, I’ll be watching with interest to see how it all turned out.

 

Previous ABC Coverage

ABC News 2/11/12 - Click to see the interview.

This won’t be our first coverage on ABC, but hopefully will be the one to finally move forward from the tone of previous ABC roastings. On February 11th, three days after my video went viral, ABC’s Dan Kloeffler tells the story, but his producers sure seemed Hell-bent on telling it with a slant. Both the on-the-street segment of his spot as well as the in-studio interview with Child Psychologist Michael Bradley certainly put the laptop-shooting incident in negative light. Most of you probably remember a much longer interview from Dr. Phil on the Today show six days later. The ABC one wasn’t as bad, but it wasn’t great either. Then they wondered why I didn’t want to go on their show when asked. Really? Seemed to me they already had their minds made up by that time.

GMA 2/21/12 - Click to See the Interview

Following that news segment by about ten days we were the subject of yet another ABC broadcast. On February 21st we were the subject of George Stephanopolous on Good Morning America. I just noticed in his piece that he says “and he’s defending himself now to ABC’s Andrea Canning.” For the record, I never spoke to either Andrea Canning or George Stephanopolous. It’s a nice play on words he uses there though. Still, you shouldn’t lie like that on national television, George. You’re supposed to be above that. However, whether I spoke to her or not, it remains true that Ms. Canning did a decent job of reporting the actual news, without a lot of political slant thrown in. She was even kind there towards the end, which I sincerely appreciate.

 

Closing the Book on the Story? Maybe.

Imagine my surprise when Muriel Pearson, a producer for 20/20 calls me and say she wants to do a piece for their show, but not a piece about the “Laptop Dad” she promised. After hearing what they wanted the piece to be about, I somewhat reluctantly agreed to think it over and talk to my wife and kids about it and let her know our answer.

Preparing for the Interview

We talked over the next few weeks a few times and in the end, we agreed to do the interview.  Great (insert sarcasm here) more cameras!

Having had to be on the other end of the camera as much as we have recently, I now understand why families who have been on television interviews always look so harried. After two and a half solid days of people saying “can you do that again” and “wait while we get set up” it can be a lot to deal with. They’re everywhere. Thankfully ABC only brought down one videographer and one sound man.

Muriel herself was awesome to get to know in person. She had a really good personality and tried her best to make us feel as normal as possible throughout the process.  Moreover she seemed to really to capture “us” being “us” more than asking us to stage things for the benefit of the camera, which has happened before, though we always refused. Our approach has thus far been “if you want to experience our life, turn on your camera and follow us around. We’re not going to put on a show for your benefit.”

On the final day I got the chance to meet Sharon Alfonsi, the correspondent who be the on-screen presence during the piece.

Fast forward three weeks and guess what? It’s on the air tomorrow! I’ve been feeling good about it all along, but I’ll admit to a little apprehension tonight when I saw the advertisement for the episode airing tomorrow.

Xtreme Parents - Airing Friday May 4th, at 10 PM EST on ABC

They are calling the episode “Xtreme Parents.” I’ll admit… that’s a little scary, but there’s nothing I can do about it now except hope that what we were told this story is going to be about and what it’s actually about will be the same thing. During two and a half days of b-roll footage there are a lot of opportunities to create spin for any number of stories, no matter what the premise was for their arrival.

The idea was supposed to be about what normal life here was like for us, how we parent our kids in general, and letting people see behind the “Laptop Dad” and the “Rebellious Daughter” and see our family as a whole; healthy, happy, and rarely possessed of a dull moment.

A lot of disavowing occurred during the interview. For example they were under the impression that everything around here is “Tommy and his kids.” My wife, who has apparently had enough of that idea being permeated, was quick to just about come across the table and set the record straight. Talking about getting her dander up. Whew. That was… intense. I just sat back and kept my mouth shut during that part. We parent as a team. We always have and we always will. I really hope that comes through.

And we’re normal. That’s the key thing we hope shines through all this. We have a normal house, normal yard, normal pets, normal problems, and normal kids. They have their great days and their less-s0, but so do we. At the end of it all though, we’re a wonderfully happy family. The initial impression I got, based on the request for the interview, was this was going to have little to do with the laptop-incident, but I guess I’ll find out tomorrow with the rest of you whether that’s the case.

Why am I telling you this? Well, for two reasons really.

First, I hope you’ll all tune into watch. We certainly will be. I’ve never got to actually see any of the interviews except on the Internet, so it will be interesting to see my living room from the vantage point of, well, my living room.

Second, I have a natural distrust of the media, though I do get a good feeling from Muriel and Sharyn both, irrespective of the scary logo show on their preview. I know what I can do with an editing both and my skills are amateurish compared to theirs.  If this turns out to be another Tommy-bashing episode from ABC, then I’ll have been here first to set the record straight, rather than following up with a lot of “but they said…” comments.

Well, there’s nothing to do now but sit back and wait for the DVR to cue up. Remember to watch tomorrow. All three of us, and maybe even Bonnie and Piper, will be on.

Watch 20/20′s Xtreme Parents Friday May 4th, 2012 at 10 PM Eastern on ABC 


Go Chrome for Charity – Limited Edition CR-48 Available! (Rare)

You might or might not be familiar with what was probably the most succesful beta test in the history of hardware testing, but last year Google came out with a limited edition unbranded Netbook. No one knows exactly how many of them were made, but the numbers vary from 10,000-60,000.

These were released to beta-testers as a way for Google to test their new Chrome OS netbook. Since they were beta-versions they were shipped with absolute no logos, no icons, no identifiable information whatsoever. I registered for the beta test one day and in two days Fed Ex appeared at my door with this cool little stealthy black-box netbook running Chrome OS.

It’s COMPLETELY run within the cloud, the first true netbook ever, and was only released to a small testing community. Well, I’ve got one and I’m going to simply put it here for auction on 8minutes.

From full power-off to boot takes about 8 seconds. It’s the fastest booting machine I’ve ever had. It boots a lot faster than my cell phone! If asleep, it will awake and return you to work in about 3 seconds!

It has an 3G card for using it over 3G on the road, but of course you’ll need to set that up with your own provider! After all a cool black netbook with no connection to the net is nothing more than a… black book. I setup the test account with Verizon and used it for awhile and loved it. It spent a few days riding with me around in the truck on 3G just for fun.

Details of the Auction:

This auction is pretty simple. It’s more of a sale than an auction. Everything I list on eBay has a ridiculously high bidding war. I figured I’d try it this way and see if this has better luck. The price of the CR-48 is set at $500.00, flat. The rarity of these makes them worth that alone! I can’t run an actual auction here on 8 minutes or I would. So, we’ll just have to settle for a flat-rate sale.

I’m going to donate 20% of the sale to the MDA. Just like I do with most other things I’ve been selling lately, I’m trying to leverage some of this fame for charity. Yes, of course I need to feed my family too, so no, I’m not giving 100% of every dime I make, but I’m doing what I can and I think that’s all any charity asks of us as individuals.

How do you KNOW it’s going to charity?

Well, partly you’re going to have to trust me, but you can also feel free to call them and bust me wide open if I’m lying! I’ll give you a way to prove it. Anything and everything I do on Facebook gets hundreds and hundreds of shares, so I’m sure if you’re the one to bust me for lying about giving to charity you’d be as infamous as I am… so just trust me that I’ll make the donation!

Below, you can see a copy of the bank transfer I made to MDA a few days ago for the monies we raised at the OMJ Swap Meet fund raiser. It includes both the fact that I paid them, the date I paid them, the address AND the phone number of the local MDA office that gets the donation. Once this item is paid for, I’ll take a similar screenshot and post it here for proof. Call them yourself to check in on it if you’re not sure if I’m for real. By now, they know who I am. lol. I’ve pretty much got the director on speed-dial now, but it’s all been fun and we’ve raised a ton of money for a really cool organization!

Proof of the Previous Donation

 What does the item look like?

Well, like I told you, it’s completely unbranded. It was NEVER sold anywhere by anyone. It’s got no logos, no stickers, and looks like the kind of thing the CIA issues to field operatives. In short, it’s just freakin’ cool! So, here are some pictures of my actual unit. These aren’t stock photos. This is the exact condition it’s in right now… MINT. It’s just too danged cool looking to let it get scratched!

The working surface - no logos, flat black finish all over.

The top of the CR-48- no markings of any kind. No logos.

In case someone asks… duh, yes it includes the power cord.

Why are you selling it?

1) To pay my bills and raise some money for charity.

2) Because the last thing I need is ANOTHER computer around the house! I have two desktops, two laptops (or more maybe; I’m really not sure), a tablet, a smart phone, two GPS’s, and probably more stuff I haven’t thought of. I’d like to consolidate my stuff, clear some room in my office, and maybe I can sell three or four of my computers for enough to buy a nice big shiny new one. That honest enough?

How can I buy it?

Click the buy-now button below and it will take you straight to the paypal page. If you have a paypal account, you can pay that way. If you don’t, you can pay via credit card without having an account. I’ve been a verified paypal member for most of a decade and I’ve got a 100% approval rating with them. Feel free to check me out with them first if you’d like.

Are YOU going to be the one to own this limited edition netbook? I wish the best of luck and a lot of enjoyment to whomever wins it!

Things to remember:

When you pay for the item, PLEASE don’t forget to enter your physical address. I ship via UPS, so I can NOT ship to a PO Box.

And just in case this needs to be said, I won’t ship outside the US. I’m not dealing with those customs forms… ugh. That’s not worth the hassle! The buyer HAS to be within the United States. Otherwise, you’re just making a huge donation… is that clear enough? lol

If you’re going to be the one to buy it, click here to be directed to PayPal

Specs:

If you have NO idea what this netbook is, I’d suggest NOT being the one to buy it.

If you want to see the specs yourself, rather than me typing them out, you can just read them here: http://gdgt.com/google/cr-48/specs/

 Autograph:

Ooh, the pressure! You realize that if I make a mistake on that pretty flat black finish there’s no going back? You’re liable to get a funny-looking scribble with a “sorry” note attached on a post-it!

I’m still amazed that people think my autograph worth something, but yes, if you buy it and you want me to, I’ll certainly be happy to autograph it. So far I’ve made it a habit to only autograph things that raise money for the MDA, but I guess this qualifies! Just let me know. I’ve got a big silver sharpie sitting right here that rarely gets to be used, just for the occasion! Hell, if you’ll toss in another hundred bucks for the MDA I’ll make a YouTube video and thank you in front of the whole world if it’ll raise more money for the MDA!
(ok, really, who’d actually do that?)


Protect Your Kids. Save Money While Doing It!

Ok, almost a month of working just paid off! After my initial response to the question of “What is your best advice to parents of kids in social media?” I got a TON of email responses wondering what software I would recommend to parents. I initially held off telling people about it because, quite honestly it’s not the cheapest one out there but it IS HANDS DOWN the best one out there. (And I know, because first – it’s my job to know, and second – because I’ve used them all over the years myself with my own kids and employees.)

Fast forward a month later and I’ve managed to get the company to do a temporary price drop, for my viewers only. Through March 31, 2012, I was able to get a them to agree to a 40% price cut across the board on ALL their software.

This is the only site in the world where you can get this deal. Feel free to Google the products your self first to be sure. Buy it through these links and through the end of March you save 40% AND $10 of your cost (off the top!) goes straight to a good charity!

This is the best software on the planet for protecting your kids online and for being alerted if your children’s phone travels somewhere you don’t expect it to be (were they kidnapped? Did they skip school?). As a parent who has experienced the “Oh God, where is my kid?” scenario, I can tell you this will save your blood pressure as well!  Best of all, you absolutely do NOT have to be a computer geek to know how to use it. Even at the new price, they will still gladly help you install it and they provide continuous support any time you need them. They’re a really great company to trust to protect your children! I don’t know how better to say it.

I’ve worked really hard to get this for you and I hope you enjoy it!

Spector Pro, eBlaster and eBlaster Mobile has been discounted 40% and we are still able to maintain the $10.00 donation to the Muscular Dystrophy Association for each order! This is unheard of!  Keep yourself informed when your kid is online!  I did!

Now $59.95   Spector Pro Windows:   https://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1068?a=2806

Now $59.95   eBLASTER Windows:       https://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1069?a=2806

Now $39.95   eBLASTER Mobile Android: https://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1070?a=2806

Now $39.95   eBLASTER Mobile Blackberry: https://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1071?a=2806

UPDATED on 3/28/12 – MAC Versions have been added.
Now $59.95
 
 Spector Pro MAC
https://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1078?a=2806

Now $59.95   eBLASTER MAChttps://buy.spectorsoft.com/p/1079?a=2806

If you aren’t familiar with what the programs do, feel free to check out our Protect Your Kids page for more information.  I truly recommend these award winning monitoring solutions so that you can stay informed and stay in the know.


OMJ Teams with MDA and 8Minutes

OMJ Logo

A while back I mentioned on Facebook that I’m part of an organization called OMJLIST. If you don’t know what it is, it’s a new company started up to provide people a way to utilize Social Selling. It’s like Craiglist on crack and cheaper than eBay, not to mention easier to use. (Can I say “crack” on a blog post without offending someone? Hope so.)

The guys over at OMJ have also managed full Facebook integration as well as Twitter and Google+ integration, so you can share your ad with your friends on Facebook or other social sites with one click. For example, since I live in Stanly County, if I put Stanly County in my ad description then my ad will automatically get posted to the OMJ Twitter and OMJ Stanly County Facebook groups. THEY DO THE PROMOTING FOR YOU! It’s an awesome feature!

All in all it’s a GREAT site and is easier to use than most any other site out there. I was going to say “than any other site out there of it’s kind” but there really are no other sites that I’ve seen like it.

Unlike the other sites out there, at least one of the admins (usually more) are online most all day every day to help users with questions, or to explain features of the site. You really can’t ask for a better way to sell your stuff. No fees to sell or buy, simple and basic rules, and anyone can join!

I got a call the other night from the CEO of OMJLIST with an idea he had that is too good NOT to share! So here’s how it works.

Anyone can signup and use OMJ for free, but they also have three other kinds of memberships. One is called VIP and is $12 per year. Another is for businesses and is $60 per year. Finally, there are also advertising spots open on the omjlist.com pages for $40 per month. The CEO, Bill Guyther, called me with the following offer that I love and I hope you will too.

What’s the Deal?

From now on… until (meaning forever as far as I know) you can sign up to any of the paid memberships and 50% of the gross cost (meaning half of your fee) will go directly to the Muscular Dystrophy Association. This isn’t half of the net profit, or anything of the sort. A full HALF of your membership fee goes to charity!!!! I freakin LOVE this idea! I jumped up and down and couldn’t wait to write this blog post!

Letter from the CEO of OMJLIST

OMJ Founder, Bill Guyther

As the Founder of OMJ! One Man’s Junk LLC I want to say that I am excited to be a part of this movement with our partner, Tommy Jordan, to raise awareness and money for the MDA.

OMJ is built on a foundation of helping people and fully believes that karma does exist and I can’t think of a better way to continue to show that than with this announcement.

We hope you will join forces with us and help us make it a massive success. Together we can and together we will.

Happy Junkin’! ~ Bill Guyther

How the VIP Membership Works

Just like any other selling website out there, you always run the risk of not knowing who you’re doing business with. Are they who they say they are? Are they a real person or some kind of spam bot? eBay does a pretty good job of stopping these, but they’re expensive for sellers to use and hundreds of thousands of scammers get through anyway. Craigslist is simply too full of spammers for be to even try to use them anymore.

VIP on OMJLIST stands for “Verified Internet Profile” and costs twelve dollars a year. That is the ONLY fee you pay for ALL the features on OMJ, present and future.  As part of this process, you are will be asked to provide publicly identifiable information. All the verified users go through a simple public records background check, performed by OMJ by an outside verification agency.

These users are screened individually to be sure there is some record that they ARE who they say they are, that they live WHERE they say they do, and that they do NOT have a criminal record at the time they signed up, and aren’t a registered sex offender. If any of this information is found, the user cannot become verified. In short, the process exists to make your experience safer within the OMJ community.

Do you have to get signed up as a VIP to use the site? Nope. And I won’t try to use my fame or influence to get you to do so. If you sign up, do so because you’re comfortable with it. Once you signup for the free account you can feel free to use the chat feature to communicate with any of the admins to get more information about the process. That’s why they’re there. All the admins are vetted thoroughly and are a very small, close-knit, group of people. They’re all working from their own offices, NOT FROM INDIA, and they are all a pleasure to deal with.

So, when you sign up for OMJLIST, just remember to use the words “From Tommy Jordan” in the required field that asks “How did you hear about OMJ?” and a full 50% of your membership fee will be donated to the MDA.

My thanks to Bill Guyther and the awesome team over at OMJ for coming up with this idea! I wish you many new members, and hope that MANY more kids get help this year because of your efforts!

OMJ Video

Last December I uploaded a YouTube video that shows some of the advanced search capabilities of OMJLIST.COM. Since OMJ is designed to help you sell in your local area OR throughout the US, I thought I’d show you how to find Friends on the site, or locate items near you. I guess in hindsight I should have done more video walk-throughs because this is the only one I have at the moment.  I’ll get around to making more soon! In the meantime, if you’d like to take a look at how it works, you can play the video below.

OMJ In the News

You can also see here where OMJLIST was featured by Fox News in Charlotte NC.

Full Disclosure:

In the interest of Full Disclosure, it should be said that I DO own a very small percentage of this company. Since so many people out there are surely going to ask “Tommy, are you going to make money from this?” I thought I’d answer that clearly right here. Yes, eventually I would probably make some money from it; after the investors are paid off, the servers are paid for, the other costs are paid for,etc. I would likely see a profit from it sometime around 2015 or so. However, since I’m tired of the “hater” emails that are generated anytime I promote anything:

Dear Bill Guyther (and all the other admins),

I am formally renouncing my claim to ANY INCOME that would normally be derived from ANY SALE that results from this promotion. Since I know we have the capabilities to track users who signed up through this process, I want to clearly and concisely state that WHEN and IF I ever were to earn a commission from my participation in One Man’s Junk LLC, that ABSOLUTELY ZERO revenue should ever come my way for any sale that contains the words “From Tommy Jordan” in the “How did you hear about OMJLIST?” section of the sign-up process, to be effective from today March 14th, 2012 until at LEAST one year from this date. If I decide to continue this in perpetuity, I will adjust this blog post to reflect such on or before March 14th, 2013.

What you and the other admins are doing with the OMJ MDA promotion literally takes money OUT of your pockets, so what monies are left should be distributed to the other admins and owners, or however the Board of Directors sees fit.  Again… no income from any signup utilizing this promotion should financially affect me in any way.

I KNOW someone’s still going to have something to say about it, but that’s as clear and concise as I can make it. It’s out there in public and if I ever changed it, surely you would all know and call me out on it. I’m not sure what else I can do to both endorse this HUGE sacrifice OMJLIST is offering to support charity and at the same time to assuage users who think I’m in it for the money.

 Now.. Go Sell Some Junk!

Visit www.omjlist.com to signup now! Buy, Sell, Trade, Swap, Bargain, Haggle, Barter, and enjoy a website that makes it fun and safe to do so!

 


Can you send your kids to bed without dinner?

A gentleman by the name of Max wrote a blog post commenting on one of my own. (Thank you Max, by the way. It was a great article!) At the end of the article he mentioned something I’ve heard come up lately and people have asked my opinion on it. The issue is sending your children to bed without dinner.

Author’s note: I find it, and I’m not sure why, less polite to use the word “kid” instead of “children” or “child.” However, since I seem to be writing about them a lot lately, I’m going to simply state that I’m using the word “kid” because I don’t feel like typing the extra five characters every time I mention it. Hope that’s ok… 

I guess there is probably more than one approach to this question. Qualifying questions have to be asked, such as “What is the reason for sending your kid to bed without dinner?” Is it because they  didn’t want what you cooked for dinner or was it for actual punishment for some misdeed?

The sad thing is, parents across the nation seem to be split on this matter. In my completely-non-official research I see three camps of parents.

  • 20% Oh God no, that’s child abuse.
  • 20% Dang right I’d send my kids to bed without dinner.
  • 60% I’m not sure if I can legally do that or if someone from social services will come take my kid.

Sad, isn’t it? It’s a shame that most parents I’ve heard from are actually scared to use this as a parenting tool because they’re not even sure if it’s legal! Wow.

In response, I’m taking a moment to collect some information in a survey. I’ve tried to collect as much relevant information without collecting anything identifiable from anyone who fills it out. It doesn’t ask your name, where you live, etc. It’s just a few simple yes, no questions. I’d really like to know what you reader’s think of this issue.

Click here to take the survey.

Now, since I’m asking you to tell me your thoughts, it’s only fair that I tell you mine. So here goes.

IS IT OK to send your child to bed without dinner?

Let’s start first with the law, because I don’t like people who haven’t read child abuse laws trying ignorantly to throw them back in my face. According to the best legal definitions I can find from the ”Definitions of Child Abuse and Neglect” from the Child Welfare Information Gateway, which I can only assume to be the current “law of the land” on the subject, the answer is YES. You certainly CAN legally do this (at least where I live. Your mileage may vary)

Specifically you can locate the document itself at:

http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/statutes/define.cfm

The PDF file is currently listed as being last updated as of February 2011.

Since I live in North Carolina, I’m only able to cite the specific reference for my own state, but all the states laws are located within that document, so you can easily find your state’s regulations there as well.

The NC statute on the issue states:

North Carolina
Physical Abuse
Citation: Gen. Stat. § 7B-101
‘Abused juvenile’ means any child younger than age 18 whose parent, guardian, custodian, or caregiver:

• Inflicts or allows to be inflicted upon the child a serious physical injury by other than accidental means
• Creates or allows to be created a substantial risk of serious physical injury to the child by other than accidental
means
• Uses or allows to be used upon the child cruel or grossly inappropriate procedures or cruel or grossly inappropriate devices to modify behavior

Neglect
Citation: Gen. Stat. § 7B-101
‘Neglected juvenile’ means a child:
• Who does not receive proper care, supervision, or discipline from his or her parent, guardian, custodian, or caregiver
• Who is not provided necessary medical or remedial care
• Who lives in an environment injurious to his or her welfare
• Who has been placed for care or adoption in violation of law

In determining whether a child is a neglected juvenile, it is relevant whether that child lives in a home where another child has been subjected to abuse or neglect by an adult who regularly lives in the home.

‘Serious neglect’ means conduct, behavior, or inaction of the juvenile’s parent, guardian, custodian, or caregiver that evidences a disregard of consequences of such magnitude that the conduct, behavior, or inaction constitutes an unequivocal danger to the juvenile’s health, welfare, or safety, but does not constitute abuse.

So, nowhere in that definition of child abuse do I see the mention of the word “food.” Before you start yelling, go read the document. Many states DO mention food in their statutes. North Carolina isn’t one of them.

The beginning definition located on page 3 of the document, seems to be a little vague. It states:

"Neglect is frequently defined as the failure of a parent or other person with responsibility for the child to provide needed food, clothing, shelter, medical care, or supervision to the degree that the child’s health, safety, and well-being are threatened with harm. Approximately 24 States, the District of Columbia, American Samoa, Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands include failure to educate the child as required by law in their definition of neglect.6 Seven States specifically define medical neglect as failing to provide any special medical treatment or mental health care needed by the child.7 In addition, four States define medical neglect as the withholding of medical treatment or nutrition from disabled infants with life-threatening conditions."

I’m going to point out what I consider to be two important caveats in that definition.

  • It seems kind of slimy to use the words “Frequently defined” in a document that’s supposed to explain something clearly.  However, as I read the document through, I saw that some states DO and some states do NOT have certain mentioned stipulations in their codes. Food is one of those. I showed you the NC statute earlier, but you can read the others yourself. California, for example, does have a line that includes the definition to be “the willful, prolonged failure to provide adequate food. (I‘ll also state that skipping a meal, in my parenting definition, isn’t covered under that caveat.)
  • It would seem to me, if I restructured that sentence to discuss only food, it would read “the failure of a parent to provide needed food to the degree that the child’s well-being is threatened with harm.” Again, I don’t think missing a meal is defined as threatening my child’s well being.
For those of you who DO want to jump all over the idea that missing a meal is endangering a child’s welfare, I urge you to step back and use your logical head for a moment before you jump to the comment section at the end of this blog. Have you ever had a child get up in the morning and want to run outside and play with their friends all morning/afternoon? Has that child ever just played right through lunch time and forgotten to come back and get a sandwich or snack or whatever? Have you ever asked you kids “What did you have for lunch?” only to hear “Oh, we were too busy playing. We forgot to eat.” If you have a child that is over the age of about 14 years old or so and you can say that has NEVER happened, then I posit you are probably lying… every kid does it from time to time. As an adult, I do it ALL the time. I’ll get so wrapped up in some project I’m working on that I miss breakfast and lunch, and I’m starving when dinner time finally rolls around. So, unless you’re willing to add “missing lunch due to excessive fun” to the link of punishable offenses, then don’t start sending me bleeding-heart comments that missing dinner is any worse.

WHEN is it acceptable to send a kid to bed without dinner.

There were a few rules about dinner when I was growing up. These rules applied at my mom’s house, my dad’s house, my aunt’s house, and my grandparent’s house. Those rules were:

  • Take what you want and eat what you take.
  • You will eat what I cook or you’ll go hungry.

That was basically it. The first rule was because we kids often had bigger eyeballs than stomachs, at least that’s how I remember it being explained to me. I saw that heaping pile of spaghetti and garlic bread and I wanted a whole plate full and then wanted to try to steal garlic bread so my brother wouldn’t get the “good” pieces. My parent’s broke me of that habit quickly.

Once I was old enough to be able to serve myself at the table it was an easy lesson to learn. The first time I grabbed a plate full of something I feasibly couldn’t possibly finish I didn’t understand that I was depriving the rest of my family of food they very well could eat. I was just a kid who wanted a plate full of food. Money was tight and my family didn’t have it to throw away, so what we cooked was important and what was wasted on my plate could very well have been lunch the next day if I hadn’t wasted it at dinner.

I remember saying “Mom, I’m full” and she looked at me and said “No, you’re not” and kept right on eating. She made the point to me that since I served it, I was going to eat it. Further, I could choose to sit right there and eat my meal and not whine about it OR I could go to my room for the rest of the night and it would STILL be there come breakfast time.

Now, to be honest, I actually don’t think I ever tested that particular theory. Maybe I did. If so, Mom might chime in on this post and share the truth with everyone. lol.

The point is; it didn’t take me long to figure out I could just serve myself less and then always get more if I wanted it. It’s a real simple lesson in sharing and not being greedy and it’s stuck with me all my life. My kids follow the same rules. If you put it on your plate, you’re going to sit at the table and eat it or you’re going to sit there until you fall asleep face first in it… then you can have it when you wake up. lol. If you don’t eat your dinner, you don’t get dessert. Simple basic rules.

There were times as well that my parents would cook something I didn’t like, or wasn’t in the mood for. I’d throw a temper-tantrum and say “I’m not eating _fill_in_food_here” and they’d quickly say something similar to “You’ll eat what’s put on the table, or you won’t eat.”

I actually remember puffing up my chest a few times and screaming “Fine!” and walking away. They sent me to my room and I stayed there…. all….. night. Truthfully it was probably only five minutes into their dinner that I decided I really DID want to have eaten dinner with them. Sorry. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Go directly to jail…

It only took a few times before I got the hint that maybe if I asked Mom or Dad BEFORE they started cooking dinner, what we were having, and if I asked politely, I might have the opportunity to convince them to cook something I wanted. But when you walk in the kitchen halfway through Mom   cooking lasagna and then whining that you wanted chicken, well, too late bud. Suck it up! You can have chicken tomorrow. Only now, as a parent myself, do I know how irritating it is to go grocery shopping for something, spend time making something, only to have one of your kids whine because they’d rather have fish sticks!

So…. I’m sorry Mom, for all the times I know I did that. I know now what you were going through.

My own related story – from about two weeks ago:

It’s amazing to me how a kid can be “full” then be ready to gobble down a gut full of ice cream ten minutes later. I’ve seen my son say “I’m soooo full” then pat his belly and say “Oh, I just don’t think I can eat another bite.” Amazingly one of us can say thirty seconds later – I think I want a brownie and BOOM the monster appetite is back in full force!

So the other night this happened. My son had just eaten enough to feed a starving Somali village and yet asked for more, and a REALLY large amount more. I tried to stop him and said “You’ll never eat all that – don’t get so much”

His response was typical.. “Uh huh. I can too!” About three minutes later a comment about dessert was made. Then all of the sudden.. he’s full to the brim of dinner and can’t stomach another bite. (coincidence right?)

We told him, you can have dessert when you finish that huge plate you just served yourself…. or you can sit there and stare at it until it’s cold, or you can get up from the table now and you can finish it for breakfast instead….

You should have seen the look on his face! His master plan was ruined! lol. Guess what though? I bet we’ll only have to pull that trick two or three times to correct that behavior.

The next time he’ll either eat all his food and not waste the rest, or he’ll eat until he’s almost full on the bet that maybe one of us will make brownies, cookies, or something similar for dessert. Either way, it’s a win-win for our family and an object lesson.

The OTHER reason to send your kids to bed without dinner.

I would think the other reason for a normal parent to send their kids to bed without dinner would be as punishment for some other action or misdeed. Have I ever done this? Not that I can think of, but I would if I felt the need was there.

The day my now-famous-daughter came home – the day of the “He shot the laptop” incident, was almost one of those days. She came home and I sent her to her room. When it came time for dinner I felt bad eating without her and called her to eat. My wife was out in the field working still at 8:30 so we had to go ahead and whip something together without her. My daughter and I both ate in miserable silence and then I sent her back to her room. Was that being a wimp? I don’t think so. Would it have been wrong if I’d kept her in her room to miss dinner? I don’t think so either. I just didn’t in that particular scenario.

If my kids did something bad enough that I thought deserved a severe punishment, but that I felt didn’t warrant a spanking, sending them to bed without dinner would be a good alternative in my book.

At the end of the day, missing a meal isn’t child abuse. That’s my take on it.

So.. one more time.. I’d like YOUR view on it.

Click here to take the survey.

Have a good day y’all.


NBC Today Show – TV Schedule

Ok, I’ve got the info for those of you who are interested in watching the Today Show interview tomorrow. We’ve been bounced all over NYC today and had the opportunity to meet with the producers, etc. I don’t have a lot of time to blog right this moment, but I did want to take the time to share with you what’s going on so you could watch if you wanted to.

TV Schedule:

The schedule is shown at the actual time here in the US, regardless of the time zone. So if it’s 7:30 AM Eastern, then it will be on NBC west coast at 7:30 AM pacific too. Get it? No need to figure what time it airs in your area.

Date: 3/7/2012 (almost 1 month to the day since it all happened)

Channel: NBC/ NBC HD

Online: NBC is taking questions online for viewers who want to ask questions  (not comments… questions) to be read later on the show. If you’d like to post your question to NBC, you can do so at: http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/46633297/ns/today-today_people/t/have-question-dad-who-shot-his-daughters-laptop/

NBC will have producers aggregating questions so they can see which questions trend the most and then they will know which ones to ask us. So, if you have something you want to ask, do so anytime between now and tomorrow morning at 8:00 AM at the link above.

7:30 AM Today Show: Our segment airs first thing tomorrow morning at 7:30. Amy, Hannah, and myself will be there, being interviewed by Matt Lauer.

9:15 AM We’re coming back on the Today Show at about 9:15 AM to respond to the questions submitted online and hopefully to share a little of our points of view on some of this. Not sure how long this segment will be, but I hope you can catch it!

10:00 PM We’re coming back over to NBC to to Rock Center with Brian Williams at 10 PM. From what the producers tell me, we will be the first segment of the evening, so it’ll be right at 10:01 PM or so. Hope you can catch it.

Unknown: I’m not sure of the timing of the MSNBC segment or the Weekend Today segment yet. We’re still working those out. I’ll update this blog post as soon as I know more. Keep an eye on http://8minutesoffame.com/tvschedule/ for more info.

I’d love to stay and chat more right now, but I’ve promised NBC I’d do a blog post on the Today show blog so I have to get that started. They’ll publish it tomorrow sometime.

Thanks so much for all of you who have kept us in your prayers! Keep us there for a couple more days. There’s a lot to do and a small amount of time to do it all, so we’re scrambling up here in NYC today. I’ll write more soon.

Until next time… have a good day y’all.


Time for an Update

Wow… it’s been almost a month and the turn of events our lives have taken were never something we imagined possible only a few short weeks ago. If you’d have told any of us in my family that we’d be known world-wide for something, we would never have believed you. It’s just not something that happens to normal people. Looks like we were wrong about that, I guess.

Right after all this happened to us, we were bombarded with media requests, talk show requests, and interview requests on every available medium imaginable. Almost overnight, my daughter and I were tweeted about, Facebooked about, blogged about, written about, and more. We, or more specifically, I, was loved, hated, admired, despised, raised onto a pedestal (way undeserving), and kicked while I was down. We’ve dealt with everything from malicious users posting our home address on the Internet to telephone stalkers, to North Carolina Department of Social Services in our home at all kinds of hours investigating our family. All of this happened mostly within the first 72 hours of this event going live on YouTube.

As a direct result of this we agreed, and I posted repeatedly on Facebook, we would not be doing any media interviews unless we conducted them via email where we could be sure we have control of how our words are displayed; so no one can take what we say out of context. Fox news out of Houston was the first actual television coverage I saw and they completely misrepresented the context, the facts, and the actual words I used. It was amazing how a professional news organization could turn around and screw up something so badly. Imagine what the actual professionals could do to us if they had the chance on live television… *shudders*

So, for three reasons, we decided not to talk to the press.

Reason 1: Context

It was quickly apparent that even with my words in plain language, people were already spinning fabrications and twisting words with skill Dr. Seuss would envy; so there’s no way we were going to take the chance of having it worsened with an interview, especially a pre-recorded interview that would allow engineers to cut it up and clip it together. We didn’t know who we could or couldn’t trust. Suddenly these national figureheads are calling and showing up on our doorstep promising an open and honest interview, with no ambush tactics. Three weeks of research has taught me that a LOT of those were lies. One can spend a fairly small amount of time going online and quickly see video examples of ambush interviews performed by these shows and networks.  There was no way I was going to let that happen to myself or my family. So, we stood our ground.

Reason 2: The Lesson to My Children – and Anyone Else Watching

My daughter made a nasty Facebook post that was intended to be seen by her 400 or so Facebook friends. I made my  own response, intended for that same 400 or so friends. Hers was seen by a couple hundred people. Mine seems to have been seen by 31 million and counting. I’ve said this before, but it was truly a case where the punishment accidentally outweighed the crime.

I can’t turn around as her father and start taking advantage of all this publicity and “fame” and use it as a platform to to make money on a national or international stage. What kind of message does it send to my child to show her that it’s ok to embarrass someone as long as you profit from it in the end?

That’s not a lesson I want my kids to learn from me. That’s the kind of lesson that would have had me spanked as a child, and deservingly so, until I couldn’t sit down for a week!

Reason 3: The difference between a headline and a story.

After all the hoopla died down a little, this became my single core salient reason, so bear with me while I explain, because this sets the stage for my next thought in this post.

When all this happened, I could have had my pick of news outlets (and realistically still can). However, and maybe I’m wrong, but I feel like the only story anyone could have told three weeks ago would have centered around a few meaningless questions:

  • Why did you shoot your daughter’s laptop?
  • Do you abuse your daughter?
  • Isn’t Hannah going to be damaged/scarred/irrevocably humiliated for the rest of her life from this?
  • Do you think you’re a bad parent?
  • Are you going to seek counseling as a parent or for your family?

That was basically it. It was a headline piece. It wasn’t a story.

Telling the Story

A story has a beginning, it has a middle, and it has and end. We agreed as a family that we weren’t going to talk to the press until we had the “story” completed first, if at all.  Then and only then would we consider talking to anyone on national television. No, we haven’t really publicly stated that caveat on Facebook because it would only encourage them to keep vying for attention.

By having our “story” I mean that we have collectively gone through this process we accidentally started, from beginning to end. We’ve had time to process the effects of our actions on ourselves, and on each other. We know whether or not we’re better or worse for having lived through it. We can look back with perspective and understand how this affected us individually and as a family. Then, after all that has been accomplished, do we feel strong enough as a family to subject ourselves to that?

The answer was, yes. IF we pulled through this ok, and IF there was something others could learn from it, and IF there were substantial enough reasons why we thought it would be important enough to do this, THEN we would consider a television network interview.

After almost a month of this circus lifestyle, we’ve all agreed that we’re OK. We’re good. I know some people have cheered us on while others have ridiculed us. Some think we’re a stronger family for it while others think we’re irreparably harmed and have sentenced our daughter to a life of drug use and dead end jobs. That’s ok. Those people are entitled to their opinions and no amount of verbage I can spew is going to change that. Time will prove, both to us, and to everyone else that we’re OK and we’re a happy and healthy family.

Sticking to your Guns

Yeah, I carried the metaphor forward there didn’t I? Sorry about that. We have received a lot of support from people about sticking to our guns and not letting the media take control of our story. That isn’t going to change. This story, when it gets aired, will be our story, not someone else’s version of what we were thinking, what caused our actions, or how it affected our family.

I have learned a really important lesson in all this that, while not part of the real message I’m trying to convey here, is deserving of a segue.

When, and if God forbid you find yourself on the other side of the door from every major national network news agency… close it. Then lock it.

Take time. I don’t know what your story might be, but if it’s important  enough to them, they’ll wait for it on your terms. Don’t be flattered with all the gifts, offers to travel to New York, or Los Angeles, dinners, and patronization. It will come in waves like you’ve never imagined. We said something to someone in a conversation about my wife loving Italian food. Two days later a package from a New York deli appears on our doorstep.  In the same conversation we were discussing favorite shows on television. (Networks always want to know what your family’s favorite show on their channel is. I’m not sure why.) Anyway, my wife loves the Food Network channel and said so, talking animatedly about her favorite chefs. Within two days a signed, autographed, copy of his book arrives in the mail.  The list goes on and on. I now have enough hats and t-shirts to start my own network little league teams. (Maybe we could donate THAT to charity too. lol)

No, we didn’t ask for any of this stuff. We’ve gone out of our way when we can to tell people NOT to do that kind of thing. My wife and I are both fairly intelligent people. The more you attempt to “buy” our affections, the more we know you’re not genuine about it. But apparently it works on most people because that’s how the networks do it. Personally if someone’s going to spend that kind of money tossing stuff our way, we’d  rather just have the money to pay the mortgage. The amounts of money networks will spend wooing you is staggering, but it doesn’t actually “help” you in any way. It’s just flattery. It’s just a shame because I can imagine that just the airfare alone that networks have dished out in the last three weeks would pay my mortgage for an entire year. If you’re going to spend all that, just send the money and let me call you on the phone. lol. I mean, really. It’s crazy.

No… I don’t want television or anyone sending us money. We’ve earned every dime we’ve ever made and we’d both prefer to keep it that way. I like knowing that I deserve something when I go out and buy it, because I worked hard for it, paid all the bills, and saved accordingly and then I finally had enough left to reward myself, my kids, or my wife.

Anyway, I digressed there.. a lot. The point of this part of the story is this. If you can evade the gifts lavished at you long enough the networks will eventually come to you and say “Ok, we want you on our show for our story. What can we do to make that happen?” Then you get to do something good with your fame. Then you get to do what we’re doing now.

Uh oh, what are you doing Tommy?

Yes, we’ve agreed to go on a news program. (and I’m literally cringing as I prepare to hit the publish button on this post) I’ve spent an untold amount of hours trying to run my own business, be a father, be a husband, and trying to juggle all this for three weeks now while somehow remaining sane at the same time.

In the end, it came down to a couple of networks that we believed the most in. From those networks, for our first interview we’ve chosen NBC. This isn’t to say we won’t go on other networks if they ask, but we’re only going to do it if we can tell the stories that matter… not the ones they want to sensationalize. ABC network really has put forth some amazing efforts and offered some great things for us to do, and if they still want us to do them, we probably will. However, we also realize that part of the allure in having us on the show is to be the first show to do it. Once that first bubble is burst, it’ll likely be over. And you know what? That won’t be so bad either! I’d actually like to get back to work in my wood shop and my customers would prefer I be working on their IT issues rather than what I’ve been tied up with these last few weeks.

In the end the big decision came down to the Today show and Good Morning America. Both are truly great shows and have great things to offer. At the end of the day it comes down to two things for us. First, NBC has treated us with kid gloves all the way. They’ve been the most respectful of every network that’s attempted to talk to us. That has to count for something. Second, it just seems from my research that Today has a larger following than GMA and they resonate more with the age group we want to share our story with. So, if it ends up only being a one-shot deal, then we’ve chosen this as the venue to host it.

Why Do It?

Like everything surrounding the video that started all of this, most of the unintended conversations that sparked across the nation have been accidental in origin.

Who knew this was going to blow the top on a volcano of parents who really want to be firmer with their children but are scared to because of the constant threat of “I’m going to call social services” screamed from their out-of-control teenage child?

Parents have been coming out of the woodwork these last few weeks asking for more information on how to protect their children. Some have the naive opinion that their kids don’t need protection in cyberspace. Others have no idea of the possible dangers, both immediate and far-reaching, that social media can have on their families and even their children’s future employment or college acceptance.

This news coverage has allowed us to bargain. The news wants a chance to tell the “Laptop Shooting Dad” story and ask all the tough questions parents and kids across the nation have been repeating for weeks now. Fine. We’ve agreed to give them that.

I want a platform that, even if only for one day, can allow us to the chance to get out in front of this issue and educate parents on the dangers out there to their kids. We have a chance here. We have, whether we wanted it or not, gotten our 8 minutes of fame, so we’ve decided to use them as best we can.

What’s the Goal?

If I had to put it into a simple phrase, I’d have to say the goal of this is to “raise awareness” on a national level. We’ve got the chance to get out there for one day and hopefully not stumble over our words too much; to use this brief time to let all parent’s know that they need to wake up! There are two calls to arms I’m going to be shouting as hard as I can.

The first is to protect your children and your family from the effects of social media, and I believe that no one right now can say that with as much experience as we can. We are literally the poster-children for what can happen!

The other reason is to hopefully inspire parents to stand back up on their feet and stop bowing to pressures from their children or from social services or anyone else; to take their job seriously and realize that their first job as a parent is to raise a fully-functioning adult that can survive and thrive in the world when you finally have to let them go. A parent’s job isn’t to be their kids best-friend.

If parents can do both at the same time, then I want to urge them to tell the rest of us how. Stand up and be heard. Get your own 8 minutes of fame and help the rest of us out. That’s what this site was designed to do and that’s the message we hope they’re going to allow us to  send on national television!

See you all on Wednesday morning!

Until then,

Have a good day y’all…


Response Video: Oli White – Viral Begets Viral

My family and I have seen some of the response videos made on YouTube over the last two weeks, and still have hundreds yet to see. Some we really support and others, well, not so much, but I wanted to take a few minutes to thank the guy who made this video.

Just like I didn’t anticipate my video going viral, I don’t imagine Oli imagined his response video possibly being the catalyst for hundreds and hundreds of Chuck Norris jokes either.  I don’t know this guy, have never met him, and know nothing about him except what I’ve seen on his YouTube video, but I wanted to take a minute to thank him.

Oliver,

While I can’t tell from the video (shown below) if you were serious in your response or just made it as an off-the-cuff response to my own video, I can honestly say that nothing anyone has said or posted has made us smile like yours did. The topic was a serious one, but your reaction it was truly gut-busting funny. I’ve seen a lot of other videos I really didn’t enjoy at all, but yours is the only one I’ve watched again and again.

In case you’re wanting to know, here are our favorite parts. You’ll have to bear with our American sense of humor over here because half of the humor comes from your cultural spin on it. It’s just hilarious!

  • “So, seriously, if you’re gonna do something like that, make sure your dad doesn’t work in IT because will find out… he will definitely definitely find out.” (You don’t know it of course, but we already had that same argument in our house the LAST time she did something similar, so it was especially poignant to us, but your facial expression and diction just make it hilarious)
  • “Crafting, making it as good as possible…” You make it sound like I built the computer with my own two hands out of clay or something. lol
  • “If you want to make a cup of tea, go and do it yourself.”
    THAT one had me rolling! Of course I was originally talking about coffee, but I guess you just said Tea because it’s something you relate to. Its especially funny to us because my step-mother is French-Canadian and I can hear her saying the exact same words you used in her British-accented-English.
  •  ”Because if I did say that, I would get a massive smack ’round the head.” Again.. just such a polite and humorous way of stating it. But I’m glad your parents would smack you round-the-head for it! 
  •  ”Bang, you got a gun to your laptop. See you later.” I have no idea why but that part has me in stitches laughing every time I see it. 
  • ” I don’t think that laptop is even going to…. (pause)… turn on.”
    Did you get stuck on that one for a second? lol. Of course it won’t turn on, but you seemed to get hung up for a second there as if you didn’t know how to end that particular sentence.  
  • “I mean, is this guy Chuck Norris? Because to me.. he looks like Chuck Norris.”
    Ok, so I look nothing like Chuck Norris, but your comment was probably the single catalyst for all the Chuck Norris jokes that started permeating the web. I saw some of them, but wasn’t able to really see them all before they were pulled down or lost in the mix.  
Kudo’s from us for managing to remain polite, funny, and poignant, all at the same time.
Update:
I actually talked to Oli on the phone the day I originally wrote this (about a week ago). We connected via Facebook and then got to chat via skype for a bit. Again, I don’t really know a lot about Oli, but he seems like a genuine nice guy. He’s 17 years old and finished high-school early and is already on into college, which to me says a lot about drive and determination.
I asked him if he wanted to share anything with the viewers when I wrote this article and he was glad to. He’s was excited to get the chance to speak to those who saw his video. I felt bad actually; it was 8 PM my time when we chatted, so it was about 1 AM his time and he had class the next morning. (Oli, I hope you weren’t dragging through classes the next day!) Anyway, here is what Oli White had to say about his post:

Hello my name is Oli White.  I’m 17 years old and make video’s on YouTube because I love to entertain and bring a smile to people’s faces. February the 8th was a big day for me as well as for Tommy Jordan. Before Tommy’s Facebook parenting video went viral, I saw it and thought that it would be a cool video to talk about.

I had no intention for it to get half a million views.  All I wanted was to see what other people thought about the video. I made the video at about 2 in the morning and everything just came off the top of my head. Because I was one of the first to respond, Tommy luckily saw it and said he really enjoyed it. He ended up posting it on his Facebook which was really unexpected and got me thousands of views. The following morning i checked the video and had received over 100,000 views in a night.

Now that might not mean something to you but for someone who dreams of making a career on YouTube the feeling was just incredible. I was over the moon with happiness. Two weeks later and my video is at nearly half a million views. I was number 1 most discussed and liked on YouTube for that day, I had gained over 1,000 subscribers on YouTube and about 500 subscribers on my Facebook, they even featured me on the homepage which was incredible.

Now many people think I made the video to earn some money, the thing is I haven’t made anything from my YouTube at all because of Google banning my Adsense account. After the video went viral I got contacted by a company offering partnership. I couldn’t of done any of this without Tommy. He has helped me out so much by getting my channel name out there and I really appreciate everything he has done for me. Such an amazing down to earth guy.


The infamous title screen

(Editors Note: I didn’t pay him for those compliments, but they’re nice to read anyway!)
After talking to Oli on Skype, I had the chance to really see what a viral user can do for another. It’s really kind of crazy when you think about it.

All I did was say “Hey, I really like your stuff. You made my family laugh at a time when we really needed it. I’ll be sure to put a post on Facebook and tell people to check you out because I know you’re hoping one day to do this as a career and I think you’d be good at it.”

So, I did as I promised, and his Facebook page went crazy!  When I found his link, he had about 720 followers. Within 24 hours it had almost doubled! It just amazed me to see it, and poor Oli: he’s still flipping his lid over there in London. lol.

Disclaimer: I’ve seen more of his videos now and a few of them (two I think) have the extremely rare occasional bad word. I got yelled at by a few Facebook followers for promoting that. I wasn’t promoting THAT. I was promoting his single video, but most of them truly are funny to watch and it’s interesting for me to see the random things he can make people laugh about. So, take my warning with a grain of salt and check him out. Besides, someone has already called me out on a video on my own YouTube wall from about six years ago that I didn’t even take. I was just uploading it for a friend. In the video, I was momentarily dumbstruck at my friend’s new rifle and I dropped a word I shouldn’t have. So, I know how it feels to get yelled at for ancient history. My thoughts on it are: forget it and just be careful with what you do from now on.

However, that just drives home the point I’ve been making again and again to my family. Even a stupid moment in time from half a decade ago that was ONLY meant for a few friends… can haunt you forever. So, think REAL carefully what you post guys and gals. ANYTHING can be fair game years down the road.

In the meantime, I’m going to do as I promised and share the ways you can follow Oli through his various homes on the web.

YouTube http://www.youtube.com/OliWhiteTV
Twitter https://twitter.com/#!/OliWhiteTV
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/OliverWhitex

Until next time…

Have a good day y’all


From one Parent to Another – Protect Your Kids

Lots of you out there have seen my page about eBlaster and I would LOVE IT if you’d share your stories of using the program so other parents out there can see how it’s helped you and your family.

I’m going to share some other stories from others, posted from the eBlaster webpage when I get the time, but I feel it better to start with my own. This is too long to put on the eBlaster page on our site… no one would ever read it, so I’m giving it it’s own page here.

Why Even Do This?

After my video went viral on Facebook and I refused to do press interviews I started receiving emails from the press asking me to answer questions. I agreed to do it in public on my Facebook wall, so my words couldn’t get twisted up or taken out of context. I got lots of press requests, a ridiculously high amount, from the USA, Canada, Germany, and a ton of other countries. To date I still haven’t been able to respond to them all. There just isn’t enough hours in the day.

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